My Week With Dave: Part One

Last week I mentioned David spent the week at home, instead of at work, with a bad back. Here is an account of the first part of our week.

On Tuesday night David hobbled into the house bent over like a 99 year old man. He had injured his back at work by bending wrong. David went to his chiropractor, a very nice man who helps David keep his back healthy, but could do little to help with the pain and immobility. During this time we would learn that I was unprepared to help David as he was unused to asking me for help.

Throughout the night David's condition worsened. He couldn't sit and needed to lean on me to take mincing steps; even lying flat on his back was painful. I told him over and over again, "Do not hesitate to ask for help. Even if you are waking me up. It's just you and me and we are going to have to figure this out." David slept little and in turn so did I. Whenever David needed to change positions I had to move him. Moving a person who has at least 50 pounds more mass than me was challenging. I was forced to think back about seven years when I had a short stint in a hospital as a Radiology Clerk. My position was purely clerical but the techs showed me how to move a patient just in case there was ever an emergency and I was the only person around to help. Thankfully, I never had to assist the techs. To move David I used my weight against his and since he wasn't unconscious I told him to relax his body to make it easier. It would have been much easier if I hadn't spent the last six months losing 20 pounds. That was less weight I had to my advantage.

The next morning I walked to the drugstore to buy whatever they had that promised back relief, and a heating pad. David's van was blocking my car in the driveway or I would have driven. When I got home I saw that the neighbor had left so her driveway was open for an easier vehicle switch. It was absolutely necessary for me to get my car out because I can't drive the van. I grabbed David's keys, took a deep breath and started to mutter, "I can do this. I can do this. All I have to do is pull the van into the neighbor's driveway. Then back my car all the way to the end of my driveway and then pull the van into the spot the car occupied. I have to do this. There is no one to help me. This is a crisis situation and you have to do this." At some point I lapsed into third person while talking to myself. If only there had been a third person to move the cars.

Pulling the van into the neighbor's spot and backing my car up was easy. I felt confident. I hopped back into the van and within seconds was frantically searching for help. No matter what I did the van crookedly straddled our driveway and the neighbor's. I figured maybe I would just leave it haphazardly parked and apologize to our neighbors with cookies and beer. At one point I saw the son of one of the other neighbors get home and I almost launched myself from the driver's seat to beg him to move the van for me. He would also be handsomely rewarded with cookies and beer. But I forged ahead. The only way I was able to coax the van into a slanted but completely out of the neighbor's way was to get out of the van, walk around it, note the position of the tires and get back in and keep inching it towards home. It was a nightmare moving that van less than 6 feet. I hope there is never an emergency that requires me to really drive the van.

David made an appointment with an orthopedic doctor but the soonest they could see him was in a week. We had a feeling David would be close to healed by the appointment time but there were few other options. We could find another doctor or we could go the ER. I was against taking David to an ER. I was afraid that we would get there and they would tell us what we already knew. David's back muscles were inflamed and spasmodic, it wasn't a nerve or spine issue. There was no need for x-rays. So just take it easy, apply heat and cold, take ibuprofen and when you feel better do back exercises. The only thing a doctor could give us that we didn't already have was a muscle relaxer and what if they didn't give him pain medication? If I dragged an injured David to an ER and no pain meds weren't prescribed I would have torn the place apart. So we waited out the pain.