Only thing I did wrong was stayed in Northeast Ohio a day too long

You know you've been in Ohio too long when you develop a taste for sauerkraut.

This is the Flats, right? I mean I live here but like I'm not a tourist.

You know you've been in Ohio too long when athletes start getting pulled over in your neighborhood. (No, not Johnny but he wasn't that far away either.)

You know you've been in Ohio too long when Timofey Mozgov is on your flight into Cle.

You know you've been in Ohio too long when you start referring to "Cleveland" as "Cle."

You know you've been in Ohio too long when you start calling soda "pop," a hit & run a "hit & skip," and a barbeque "a cookout."

You know you've been in Ohio too long when you write a parody for the Browns.

You know you've been in Ohio too long when you go to a bar in another state and wonder where the wall of TVs all tuned to sports channels is hiding.

You know you've been in Ohio too long when you can just tell someone's cornhole boards and bags are not regulation.

You know you've been in Ohio too long when you decide you can handle a move to Texas.

Yes, you read that last one correctly! David and I are bound for Texas this year! His job is moving him again!

Stay tuned for "Ohiofornia: or what happens when an insane So-Cal girl gets married, moves from the West Coast to the North Coast, and looks at it all through black designer sunglasses. Now featuring Texas!"