Boo Who

Here is part two of my fake whohub interview:

What did you first read? How did you begin to write? Who were the first to read what you wrote?
(is it me or are these horribly worded questions?) I was no child prodigy I'm sure the first things I read were children's picture books and then as my skills evolved whatever was put in front of me or whatever I could get my hands on. Like every child, I was vain and began writing my name and then the alphabet in crayon. My mom was the first person to read what I wrote because she was the one who found me scrawling my name in books and on my toys. I avoided writing on the walls because no one wants to get spanked twice.

What is your favorite genre? Can you provide a link to a site where we can read some of your work or learn something about it? (there they go again asking for links.) I don't see how providing a link to my work has anything to do with my fave genre of writing. I really like to read books. Mostly chick-lit and newer lighter fiction with history,cultural studies, essays and bios thrown in to keep my adoring public guessing my IQ.


What is your creative process like? What happens before sitting down to write?
Sometimes I go out and have an "experience" so I have something to write about then I usually spend a few days pushing sentences and ideas around in my head. I get some caffeine then I power up the lappy and start typing. I force some internet troll friends to edit the post before and after it's been up then I keep revising mostly for technical errors.


What type of reading inspires you to write?
Reading short essays and other blogs. Reading the works of David Sedaris, Jen Lancaster, Jancee Dunn, Sarah Vowell and Chuck Klosterman.

What do you think are the basic ingredients of a story?
Believable characters, well-thought out dialogue and a just a bit of fairy dust. Either a story grabs you or it doesn't. Does anyone really know why?


What voice do you find most to your liking: first person or third person?
That really depends on the story being told. If a writer uses the first person, the risk of the audience thinking the author is just writing a thinly veiled memoir in the form of fiction runs high. Third person seems like a no-brainer but it can be difficult to create good characters because the writing can get hollow or overly
dramatic.


What well known writers do you admire most?
There are a lot of talented writers in the world who consistently produce quality work but I don't think I admire them. I really, really like them. If the line wasn't too long I'd like meet them and shake their hand. I admire people I know in real life.

What is required for a character to be believable?
How do you create yours?
None of my characters have ever been believable. If I knew what was required I'd be the first to share my wisdom. I'm a little short on wisdom today so how about some cynicism instead?

Are you equally good at telling stories orally? I don't know how to tell a story. That's why I started blogging.

Deep down inside, who do you write for?
Me, duh and my cat she's my biggest fan.

Is writing a form of personal therapy? Are internal conflicts a creative force?
Writing is an excellent form of therapy so obviously the more internal conflicts you have the better your writing is going to be for other people to read. Readers want to identify with the writing. What better way to do that than with the fears and problems every one faces daily? It's the whole "I'm not alone. I'm not the only one who throws salt over my shoulder. Thank God." thing.


Does reader feed-back help you?
Definitely. There is nothing worse than thinking your joke is funny when it's not. Honesty is the best policy.

Do you participate in competitions? Have you received any awards?
Not anymore. I did in middle school. Won some awards but they weren't national or anything. Looking back it seems more like a "big fish in small pond" situation.

Do you share rough drafts of your writings with someone whose opinion you trust?
Sometimes. But my dad told me to "trust no one" so yeah.

Do you believe you have already found "your voice" or is that something one is always searching for?
Sometimes I think I have found my voice but then sometimes I think I'm still searching. I like to start my search in the refrigerator. Alcohol loosens the tongue quite nicely.

What discipline do you impose on yourself regarding schedules, goals, etc.?
I lack discipline in all areas of my life.


What do you surround yourself with in your work area in order to help your concentrate?
(looks like a typo there whohub.) Caffeine, a window and iTunes.

Do you write on a computer? Do you print frequently? Do you correct on paper? What is your process?
On the lappy, no printing or correcting on paper. (we need trees for breathing not reading my drivel) Didn't you guys ask me about my process once already? This interview is getting long and I finished my Dr.Pepper like five questions ago. NEXT QUESTION PLEASE THANK YOU! I HAVEN'T GOT ALL DAY PEOPLE! THE SUN IS OUT AND I LIVE IN OHIO I NEED TO MAKE AN OFFERING TO THE GODS BEFORE THE SNOW STARTS!


What sites do you frequent on-line to share experiences or information?
Arrrgh! Again with the wanting of sites! I'm a hobbit I don't share my experiences with any other site except for facebook and blogger. WHERE'S MY AGENT OR MY MANAGER! THIS IS GETTING OLD FAST! WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DON'T HAVE A MANAGER? WELL GET ME ONE!


What has been your experience with publishers?
No experiences to speak of. Unless you count the self-published wackos that use to come into Stables & Grand Booksellers and demand that I sell their ISBN-less, spiral-bound book of conspiracy theories or they would have us shut down because they knew the CEO.


What are you working on now?
This interview and ya'll are working on my last nerve.

What do you recommend I do with all those things I wrote years ago but have never been able to bring myself to show anyone?
Is it poetry you wrote in high school before emo caught on? You might want to just burn it all and start over. Stories or essays you might be able to salvage. Join a class or a writing group and re-work the good stuff.